Gen S

tsk tsk. kids today. no patience at all. stupid is as stupid does.

unlike a virgin

"Your Honor, this was the whole point of getting married!!"


stupid backward-thinking piece of dung.

OUCH!

don't look at me; i didn't create this website.

S-T-O-O-P-I-D secretary

the solution to Time Bandit's stock woes.

really??

"Every British boy wants to be Bond."

really?? i thought they wanted to be Becks. and nail a Spice Girl. minus the whiny voice and the injuries.

dunked

of course. its Fox News. its Michelle Malkin. what do you expect?

i'm not a big fan of Rachael Ray. but i am even less of the right-wing idiotic bitch Malkin, who'll probably send the INS after me, because she was f****n born here.

Knicker Picker - Pecker Upper( NSFW)

as Borat Sagdiyev would say....

"Is Nice!!!.... High Five!!!"

The end of the world is postponed

Yes, there's no hiding from the data when theyre staring you right in the face, Wikipedia zealots notwithstanding.

This would mean that the 0.3°C global average temperature rise which has been predicted for the next decade by the UN's Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change may not happen, according to the paper published in the scientific journal Nature.

Make no mistake, I am one with the global warming crowd that we're treating this planet poorly and we need to change, but for the love of all that's holy, let's not do it through untruths and propaganda. And no hypocrisy.

peace can be a ghost

see? was that so hard?

the next Anna ...

... is indeed, the next Anna.

and while we're at it, go find the next one (or ones).

the French sent them!

why didn't the Frogs spring this surprise in 2010?

Cylons are doomed ...

... because they run Windows (spoiler alert)

stoned

well, no one watches her films these days anyway, so does it matter?

karma, karma, karma, chameleon ....

which geek are you?

that's it; i don't trust anyone anymore.

damn, it wasn't Harry!

the new grassy knoll

oh, so you know something about it eh? here's the resulting commentary.

hairspray

that's right, do as the North Americans do. wait, was he the inspiration for The Zohan?

Hot Cosplayas!

10,000 B.I.

the lyrics have been found!

Brad Pitt, upgrade king.

how to take photos, Asian-style

i was on row 4

paging Richard ...

what if my real name was Dick Hardwood?

starbiatches

goddammit, yes!!!

they saw the signs

as bad as it is here, they'll be overworked in Asia.

Weeet-weew

A good reason to pester Israeli women.

But you have to remember that she's been trained to kill you a hundred different ways.

would you eat this?

wahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

ex-porn pictures

nsfw. kinda.

Seriously, part II

Yes, seriously.

The tourism ministry on Monday named Hello Kitty as its choice to represent the
country in China and Hong Kong, two places where she is wildly popular among
kids and young women.

Right. Forgetting the fact that Hello Kitty isnt human, if theyre going to make a cartoon character an ambassador to sovereign states, I think one of the requirements is that at least the creature has a mouth.

Seriously?

Yes, seriously.

A professor at Ursinus College
in suburban Philadelphia thinks "Buffy
the Vampire Slayer" is worthy of serious academic study. ...

Edwards is far from the only academic with an interest in the show. The third
academic conference dedicated to "Buffy" is planned in June at Henderson State University in Arkansas.

The dumbing down of America continues. What next? The sociological implications to the human condition of Gossip Girl?

we happen to be dumb

says this honest and modest man.

that Blunt jackass had a piece of this.

Killers!!

Some plant murderers are holding a parade in New York to promote the further killing of our fellow living creatures, the plants.

Parade organizer Pamela Rice says the mission of the parade is to promote vegan and vegetarian lifestyles and the ethical treatment of animals.

Just because they photosynthesize doesnt mean they dont deserve the respect due to those of us who dont.

True, I swear

On the buses here are posters that advertise a clinic called Nanjing Mary Gynaecological Hospital. Nice posters, too. Glossy, with pictures of pretty Chinese girls. It's full of Chinese text of course, except for the clinic's name translated in English, and of course the website's URL. We didnt really notice the website's addrees until this morning, and when we did, we burst out in monkey laughter which may have frightened the other passengers. The URL of this gynecological hospital is... Are you ready?

http://www.malifuke.com

disgusting piece of dung.

iRon Man. wannabe.

retards

why morons should never have children ... or be near any.

it's just an illusion

can your Treo do this?

don't let these ants ...

... get in your gadget locker.

What kind of contact, you say?

Is there something theyre not telling us?

So far many of those who have been infected have been poultry workers who have come into intimate contact with infected birds.

You sure the new operating systems are better?

Remember that recent report where data from the hard disk from the Columbia shuttle crash was recovered despite the fact that it plunged from the stratosphere badly burned and lay exposed to the elements for six months before somebody found it?

Edwards had reason for pessimism. Not only were the drive's metal and plastic
elements scorched, but the seal on the side that keeps out dirt and dust also
had melted. That made the drive vulnerable to particles that can scratch the
tiny materials embedded inside, destroying their ability to retain data in
endless 0s or 1s, depending on their magnetic charge.

And yet he was able to recover the data. The reason?

Edwards attributes that to a lucky twist: The computer was running an ancient
operating system, DOS, which does not scatter data all over drives as other
approaches do.

There you have it. Today's OS's are prettier, but theyre not necessarily better. (Hello, Vista.) That just shows the inexorable downward slide of consumer gadgetry that is often the result when the marketing department trumps the tech department. This brings to mind grifter and the dude's recent geek-war on Treo vs iPhone on email.

g.i. whoa

if that's Scarlett, then i can't wait to see the Baroness!


wait ... shit ... they casted the drunk Sienna Miller! dammit!!!

KTMKK

7 Habits of Highly Effective Internet Users

But it's art!

Venetian cops, despite the city's rich cultural tradition, has clamped down on one man's artistic endeavors by arresting him for practicing photography.

A man who allegedly photographed more than 3,000 women's bottoms as they toured Venice has been arrested.

BBC News, especially BBC World, has this image of stuffy, uptight seriousness on TV. But as the Great Tit story featured in a previous post, the online version does have a sense of humor.

He has been charged with infringement of privacy. It is a cheeky crime, which could earn this 38-year-old Italian from six months to four years in jail.

Cheeky crime indeed.

strange eBay feedback

Rice shortage? Who cares?

There's a hops shortage!

With millions of hectares being given over to the government-endorsed-and-subsidized switch to biofuels, the commodities crisis has begun to affect our favorite tipple: BEER.

Gortemiller isn't acting on a spurt of creativity. He's coping with a
worldwide shortage of hops -- the spice of beer. The dry cones of a
particular flowering vine, hops are what give your favorite brew its
flavor and aroma. Prices of the commodity are skyrocketing as hop
supplies have plummeted, forcing smaller brewmasters around the United
States to begin quietly tweaking their recipes, in ways that are easily
discerned by serious imbibers.

...

The beer-brewing situation demonstrates how the global-commodity
shortage is spilling over to affect diverse industries in unexpected
ways. The hop shortage lives on the outer edges of a food crisis that's
prompted riots across the planet, and last month led U.N.
Secretary-General Ban-Ki Moon to implore the world's governments to
increase food production to stave off a 40 percent jump in the cost of
staples.

But, as every crisis presents an opportunity, I think it's time Pinoy scientists and beer lovers experiment with other herbs and spices to use as hops substitute. Who says we have to be limited to hops, eh? Off the top of my head, I can think of jasmine/sampaguita, camellia sinensis, and the rind of dalandan as beer substitute. Of course, with due respect to beer, we should think of another name for this beverage. Whad'yousay, scientists and food technologists? But remember where you heard the idea first, eh?

the field

Time Bandit, stop playing your console. and by console, i did not mean your XBox. oh wait, that's broken too.

sex and the shitty

yes, sure, go on, pretend you are gonna get some.

One more good thing about global warming

Great tits!

"It's great to hear that the great tit is able to keep pace with the rapid rate of climate change, but then it's probably in the best place to do that," observed RSPB spokesman Grahame Madge.

Youre next, human

Way back in the late 80s, when I was working at a construction site in Mindanao, we used to have fun with ravens. When we spotted a flock of them flying overhead, we took a stick, or sometimes just our hands, and pointed it at them, and they would immediately take evasive action, swerving, diving, changing their speed, and do all sorts of maneuvers. It's their reaction to someone pointing something at them, having learned that sometimes when humans point something at you, it would go bang and you'd be dead a few moments later. Pretty smart birds, I thought.

Now in a scene right out of Hitchcock's The Birds, flocks of ravens are attacking livestock.

"It's like something out of a horror film. They are horrible,
horrible birds. They see the young lambs and just fly down and help
themselves," he said.

"Sometimes you find a carcass with the eyes and tongue pecked
out, but sometimes all you find is the skin. They peck away until
nothing is left." And while some animals have been pecked to death,
others have been left to die in agony after birds have feasted on their
eyes, tongues and the soft flesh of their underbellies.

No doubt some raven discovered that these animals are pretty tasty and easy to kill and the hunting technique was quickly picked up by other ravens, like they did with the evasive maneuver trick.

Research published last year in the Scientific American also showed the
raven to be one of the most intelligent species on the planet - up
there with dolphins and apes and, unlike most other birds and animals,
capable of learning from their own actions and from observing others'
behaviour.

Lambs, sheep, calves. Pretty soon theyll be attacking babies like some chimps learned to do in Africa. Some Brit nanny goes indoors to answer a phone call, and when she comes out...

Experts cannot give a definitive explanation, but some believe it is
simply the pressure on food resources caused by the dramatically
increasing raven population.

No doubt. It's illegal in Britain to kill the ravens. But that could change pretty soon. (By the way, kudos to the reporter and said experts for not blaming global warming.)

Rumor has it

Remember that post in these august pages about the arrival of Playboy Philippines and I said something like I hope it's not as annoying as FHM Philippines or something to that effect?

Rumor has it that Hugh Hefner has pulled out -- and this unintentional pun works quite well if it's Hugh Hefner youre talking about -- the first issue of Playboy Philippines from the newstands because it apparently sucked. It IS as annoying as FHM Philippines, as this review from Jayvee Fernandez suggests. (He also gets credit for the rumor in his update.) To be fair, and with the limited access to the outside world I get from this place, I tried to track down any official report on the subject over the internets, and couldnt find any.

The slope, it slips!

In a rather longish Easter post on my blog, which I suppose grifter didnt get to the end of because it didnt have pictures, I said that

Without God there is no reason to believe we have these rights [life, liberty, pursuit of happiness, and all that]. Without God our rights are no different from the rights of a chicken. Indeed that’s the whole philosophy of Peter Singer and PETA. It is the only rational thing to believe in if one denies the existence of the source of our rights.

That is a perfectly rational position to take. There is no reason to believe that humans are in any way special, and it is certainly more humane, pardon the pun, than the other rational belief (yes I did argue that this belief is rational) that some humans are inferior and therefore do not have the same rights as a superior race, in the same way that humans, being superior to animals, can slaughter them without guilt, which is the philosophy of Hitler and the Eugenicists. But why limit yourself to animals? Plants are living creatures too, are they not? Not to worry:

Plants deserve respect, a group of Swiss experts said Monday, arguing that killing them arbitrarily was morally wrong -- except when it comes to saving humans or maybe picking petals off a daisy.

In a report on "the dignity of the creature in the plant world," the federal Ethics Committee on non-human Gene Technology condemned the decapitation of flowers without reason, among other sins.

Next, after broccoli get the right to vote, we will then move on to protecting the rights of protozoa.

[Note: Im cross-posting this to my blog too since I cant figure out where this belongs. It's insane enough to belong in Nothing, but then it has something to do with what I wrote in Verisimilitude.]

The next Gucci Gang haunt

Comes now the start of the demise of the beaches of Caramoan, with these ominous lines from an Inquirer story:

But the fourth-class municipality is expected to achieve celebrity
status soon enough, with foreign productions completing filming and
development projects in place. Even now it is being touted as the next
Boracay.

My emphasis. Even as we read those gleeful lines, Pinoy trend-whores and greedy real estate developers are making plans to slowly transform this place into a beachfront The Fort... but with a golf course. Yes, just like Boracay, which was once one of my favorite destinations back when it was a quiet little island. I remember envying a friend of mine who has been there before it had electricity; how she recounted the sights on cloudless nights when the moon was full and when there wasnt any moon you could see stars, millions of stars. I recalled the days before Mauban got its powerplant, how one night, on the way to the island of Patnanongan, near Polillio island in Quezon, I was trying to sleep off a hearty beer-lubricated dinner on the roof of the boat that was going to take us there at dawn, and looking up, saw the Milky Way for the first time. That was what I imagined Boracay was like when my friend went there as a kid.

They now call it Bora. You know a place is going to the dogs when it acquires a trendy nickname. Coming soon: Cara.

why wait ...

... for Quantum Solace, or whatever the next Bond film is called.


Homeless 007 - Watch more free videos

Panhandlers, by Madison Avenue

Thanks a lot, Annie Liebovitz

... for turning us all into pedophiles.

No this isnt the actual Vanity Fair spread, but a photoshoot of the photoshoot.

The irrational rational man

This is why I think that a totally rational man, the goal for humanity by some self-appointed messiahs, is doomed to fail.

A study by psychologists seem to indicate that people dont buy insurance to cover them in case something bad happens. They buy insurance because they think it'll actually prevent bad things from happening.

We buy insurance not just for peace of mind or to protect ourselves financially, but because we share the ancient Greeks’ instinct for appeasing the gods.

We may not slaughter animals anymore to ward off a plague, but we think buying health insurance will keep us from getting sick. Our brains may understand meteorology, but in our guts we still think that not carrying an umbrella will make it rain, a belief that was demonstrated in experiments by Jane Risen of the University of Chicago and Thomas Gilovich of Cornell.

clearly compensating

pineapple (slightly NSFW)

Iron Man hits on Iron Mike

and gets hit back.

apocalypse now

no!! this is untrue!! Playboy Playmates are not dumb!!!

boys making toys

Who's the cheeky private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks? click here for answer

the boys of summer

* our apologies to Jego, who probably cant view YouTube until he gets out of that communist/fascist country. if you are able to, just click on this.

And so it goes...

It is now complete. Our beloved SysAd in the main office has completed the task of blocking wordpress, typepad, livejournal, and now blogger. I can see your posts via Google reader, and I can post via Scribefire, but I won't be able to comment for the duration unless I use the 'safe' computer. Pfsh. If you can't comment in this blog, it's like boinking without the happy ending.

Avast there, matey!

Arrrrrr...

Last week, Congress introduced the Prioritizing Resources and
Organization for Intellectual Property Act (PRO IP Act), a bipartisan
bill aimed at increasing civil penalties and criminal enforcement for
copyright infringement, i.e., sharing MP3s.

This Draconian bit of legislation also proposed a new federal agency
tasked with the management and enforcement, titled appropriately,
WHIPER (White House Intellectual Property Enforcement Representative).

PRO IP? WHIPER? Who thinks of these acronyms? It's like they were already giving up by giving these laws lame acronyms; like they know it's an exercise in futility. Information wants to be free, bozos. Adapt or perish. Get a clue from authors who give away free digital versions of their works. They realize that book-lovers want actual physical trophies of their 'conquests' and will purchase a dead tree version of a book they acquired digitally if they really liked it.

Hello is not allowed

what th-!?!

Greed with a capital D

that's it, you bastards. next year, am not paying taxes anymore. eff you, Bush. eff you, Clinton.

dreaming on and on

What th-? What is this? Legal Stunt day?

Wadapak!

The suit seeks to declare unconstitutional and unlawful the oil exploration being conducted by the Japan Petroleum Exploration Co. (Japex) in the area for allegedly endangering the mammals and putting fishermen at a disadvantage.

The petitioners include toothed whales, dolphins and porpoises, represented by their "legal guardians" environment lawyers Gloria Ramos and Liza Osorio. [Italics mine, because really, how can you not italicize that?]

Although my heart goes out to the whales, porpoises, and dolphins, this of course merits the only response available to the court aside from hysterical, uncontrollable laughter -- dismissal.

QWERTY = Disease

What's the filthiest thing in the office? Nope. It's your keyboard.

Research by the University of Arizona last year found the average office desktop harboured 400 times more bacteria than the average office toilet seat.

They also found that, compared to men, on average women have three to four times the amount of germs in, on and around their work area.

That last bit just floors me. Filthy bitches.

Lesbos

Ummm... Ok... Whatever.

The issue boils down to who has the right to call themselves Lesbians.

Is it gay women, or the 100,000 people living on Greece's third biggest
island - plus another 250,000 expatriates who originate from Lesbos?

The man spearheading the case, publisher Dimitris Lambrou,
claims that international dominance of the word in its sexual context
violates the human rights of the islanders, and disgraces them around
the world.

Oh lighten up, Dimitris. 'Lesbian' isnt even Greek. The -ian suffix is Latin. Call yourself Lesbosites which is closer to the Greek.

Wait, do homosexual women from that island call themselves Lesbos from Lesbos?

book your flights!

Sin Cities!