Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Flags of the world

A while ago while dining in one of Nanjing's fine-dining restaurants (Not!), we noticed that the establishment had flags of different countries on display, and noted that the Philippines wasnt represented. I then remarked that it is fortunate that flags were made when they were made and not today when we have computers and software to work out the designs. Back then all Marcela Agoncillo had was needle and thread and some colored fabric. If Don Felipe for instance came to her and said something like, "You know, we ought to add some pizzazz to that flag. Too drab." Dona Agoncillo would have told him to bugger off. If the flag were made today, Dona Agoncillo would have said, "Sure. Let me get on my Adobe Illustrator and we'll see what we can do."

Now here's what would have happened to other flags if they were designed today.

please help

selling time bandit for food.
Public Service Announcements
when do we stop excusing ignorance?
lightning bolt! lightning bolt! lightning bolt!

Monday, April 28, 2008

your summer movie guide

mark your calendars!

legend:
YES - will watch in theater
LATERS - will download
EHHH - ehhhh

May 2 - Iron Man (YES!!!!)
May 9 - Speed Racer (LATERS)
May 16 - The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian (EHHH)
May 22 - Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (YES!)
May 30 - Sex and the City (EHHH)
June 6 - You Don't Mess With the Zohan (LATERS)
- Kung Fu Panda (LATERS)
June 13 - The Incredible Hulk (YES!!)
June 20 - Get Smart (YES - only because TB will be drooling for Ms Hathaway)
June 27 - Wall-E (LATERS)
July 2 - Hancock (YES!)
July 11 - Journey to the Center of the Earth (LATERS)
- Meet Dave (EHHH)
July 18 - The Dark Knight (YES!!!!)
July 25 - The X-Files: I Want to Believe (EHHH)
August 1 - The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (LATERS)
August 8 - The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 (LATERS ... kidding. EHHH!)
August 15 - Tropic Thunder (LATERS)

never should have been married

ok, roll out the Atoy Co/Kuh Ledesma, Kenny Loggins/Beth Bautista jokes.
ok, can we blame the girl now?

free meals at McDonalds

thrilla in collegia

somebody secure the film rights, and start hashing out the screenplay. call Justin Long asap!

Vista to your soul

Ballmer is a hypocrite!

eat drink orangutan

of course, they wouldn't show the pics where the orangutan rides his skateboard, does his laundry, surfs the web, and plays football because ... that. would. blow. your. feeble. minds.

oldie

quite long, but hilarious.
Cap'n Jack Sparrow lives!!!
i guess he ate too many ears?

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Friday, April 25, 2008

i think am jealous of your boyfriend


She Has A Boyfriend - Watch more free videos
honest college ad

Dell-iberately Malicious

if you don't have money, you get stuck with that unintelligible dumbass in India. good luck.



actually, you need lots of luck. you bought a Dell in the first place.
what a waste of Coke and Mentos

Thursday, April 24, 2008

well, let me give you some advice ...

... always bet on black! NOT!!

freaky hack monkeys

what?! she's #1?? oh, that's right, it was "sexiest", not "most beautiful".

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

ah, kids. always wanna be the star.
Death via Internet
are you ready, time bandit?

dem canadiens

oh so you don't want to do this, but you prefer to do this? yeah, sure, they can't shoot back and you won't go home in coffins.

txting can kill u

do we need any more arguments why texting is stupid?
Top 10 shirts to get arrested in

Woe to you scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites!

Happy Earth Day! Dont waste resources. Dont waste energy. Or else there won't be any left for rich countries to waste. We Third Worlders really ought to have a heart and pity the poor industrialized nations whose profligate lifestyles are under threat from the coming crisis. Imagine, no more private jets, no more 12-cylinder Ferraris. Al Gore will be forced to live in a house whose energy consumption doesnt equal the energy consumption of an entire African village for 500 years.

So I enjoin you, fellow Third Worlders, for the sake of the industrialized nations, do what you can. Dont let their culture disappear. For our sake, for our children's sake, and for our children's chlidren's sake.

Mother Earth thanks you.

Monday, April 21, 2008

Peace, mga repapips

It's about time. Why make alcohol and tobacco legal despite the millions of deaths attributed to it, while at the same time criminalize cannabis which doesnt have that many deaths attributed to it? Decriminalizing marijuana for personal use makes more sense. It will also pave the way for the commercial cultivation of hemp.

know it alls

with Britannica taking steps to make it easy for the blogosphere, it may give the Wikizealots a run for their money.

there's a style called komodo

i guess martial artists didn't have a chance to observe them at all, or else they would have developed a better technique. snake and crane styles won't stand a chance.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Love one another

If Jesus were here, you'll all get a smack upside the head. Idiots.
and i thought they were speaking figuratively

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Jet Li

As requested by Heartbreaker. Limited time only.

Let them eat potato

Rice crisis? No problemo.

The United Nations Food and Agriculture Organization (FAO) has
declared 2008 the International Year of the Potato to raise awareness
of the tuber's importance in addressing global hunger, poverty, and
threats to the environment.

Can the potato really do all of that? According to the United Nations, yes.


Wednesday, April 16, 2008

dog shit

yes, yes, foist this dreck upon us

Dont forget to take your vitamins

.. and die an early death.
Research has suggested vitamin supplements do not extend life and could even lead to a premature death.

...

After various factors were taken into account and a further 20 studies excluded, the researchers linked vitamin A supplements to a 16% increased risk of dying, beta-carotene to a 7% increased risk and vitamin E to a 4% increased risk.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

madam pulis

so you probably wouldn't find an Anne Curtis or a Katrina Halili in this bunch eh?

execute program

in addition to the Olympics-related post below, this could also mean a higher figure could be reached this year if all their training only yields 4th place finishes.

it ain't Al

if you're into Japanese gore-fests, click here. its just the way they roll. don't bother dissecting it (pun intended). oh, might be a little NSFW for your standard "blasphemy!" officemate.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwww....

i imagine time bandit taking this route, and proposing to his online girlfriend while they're playing in cooperative mode in Rainbow 6: Las Vegas 2. as soon as they kill the game boss, his character will get down on his knee and pop the question. due to programming constraints, a grenade pin will substitute for the ring.



* he got down on one knee because the other was blown off 7 minutes ago
** right after saying yes, the girl's character gets shot by a remaining straggler, because t.b. just wounded him (you know, like in the movies)

glaydiator

maximo! maximo! maximo!

be prepared to go home empty-handed

because China will win every medal in sight.

start your day ...

... with some ass-kicking




language might be NSFW.
my wall street journal

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Yeah! Blame the third world.

Friggin' idiots.
They describe the IPCC's assumption that the majority of future emission reductions will occur spontaneously, in the absence of climate policies, as "optimistic at best and unachievable at worst".

Led by China and India, the world is on a development and energy path that will bring a surge in carbon dioxide emissions and can end only with a transformation of global energy systems, say the authors.
Led by China and India? Are you fuckin' kidding me? Have you looked at your own country, you morons? China and India combined dont even measure up to the energy you Yanks are consuming. A very wise man once said, "Before you try to remove the mote in your brothers eye, look in the mirror because there might be a humongous piece of crap on your eye. Idiot."

You just want China and India to stop so there'll be more resources for you to waste. If you need energy, why dont you suck up the fat from your obese population?

Whatev, dude

This guy reminds me of someone.

how to scare passengers in your flight

first of all, make sure the airplane has wi-fi.

then turn on your laptop.

open your favorite browser.

open this page of nothing.

look for this post.

clasp your palms together and make like your praying.

make sure everyone notices you.

then click on this link.
are you 1 of the 50?

start leeching

like i said, enjoy it while you can!

you call yourself a photog?

i'm not impressed until you own one of these ...

pillow talk

can i have my pillows changed, please? i want some thick, chunky ones.

You, sir, are one lucky sumbitch.

This kind of reminds me of that opening scene in Sexy Beast.
A tourist had a lucky escape in Austria when a 47-stone boulder landed on a toilet seconds after he finished using it.


Hubba hubba. Wait, youre dead!!

Even disembodied spirits deserve to look hot.
Sexy lingerie sets have reportedly become a hit among Malaysia's ethnic
Chinese, who buy them to offer to their dead relatives on the Qingming
Festival this Friday.

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

goddammit!

you better prosecute these thieves, or else i will start a riot. i'm a taxpayer, dammit!!!

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Long pig - Yum!

Ted Turner predicts we'll be eating each other in a few years.

Failure to address global warming will have us all dead or eating each other by mid-century.

So says Ted Turner, the restaurateur, environmentalist and former media mogul whose controversial comments have earned him the nickname "Mouth of the South."

Unfortunately, science is not on his side.
So far as food production is concerned, it is not clear why a warmer climate would be a problem at all. Even the IPCC concedes that for a warming of anything up to 3 per cent, "globally, the potential for food production is projected to increase". Yes: increase.
Awwwwww.. I guess that means long pig won't be on the menu any time soon. Too bad. I was thinking of befriending a few vegetarians myself. I heard theyre more tasty.

only one way to settle this ...

... let them fight each other in those costumes.
an old WTC brochure

calling it like it is

Sunday, April 06, 2008

YES, Goddamnthem!!!

5 robots u probably should not do

a sure sign of the Apocalypse.

For many college students, a new relationship isn't real until it's on Facebook.

"You got a Facebook and it's not on there, then it's not official."


and a relationship has to be finished via writing on The Wall.pure bullshit. sounds like we got dumber in the 21st century.
enjoy the internet as long as you can, folks!
all hail the King

no, it ain't Starscream

the bitch from the Transformers is giving you the finger

Moses has passed on ...

... to wherever, parting the Red Sea one last time and escorted by monkeys with guns.



now the NRA needs a new mascot. any candidates? Clint Eastwood? Sly Stallone? what, Michael Moore's applying? oh, the irony.

SMNT

What-nappak?!
7 Jokes That Came True

learn to dance like Mick Jagger

... by watching this clip

Saturday, April 05, 2008

pr0ntability

nope, i don't have such things in mine. no siree.

Friday, April 04, 2008

Banzai! (NSFW)

Japan recently had its first-ever adult expo at the Makuhari Messe convention center near Tokyo. In a press release the organizers of the "Adult Treasure Expo" vowed to "draw the adult industry out of the darkness and secrecy which has traditionally surrounded it, to the place of honor and value which it deserves."

Thursday, April 03, 2008

like i said below, they're back!

almost famous

if you don't have the guts to create your own Wikipedia entry, then maybe you can use this.

just make sure you don't appear here.

Jack Sparrow works for Al Qaeda!

piracy fuels terrorists?? really? shit! i must be getting my software from the wrong vendor! or better yet, i should start paying the wrong vendor!!!

Hell, yeah!

It's the Hellboy trailer!

And I think Selma Blair is hot. Sue me.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

60 fps? holy shit!

better get ready for your next career - paparazz0!

those without NYTimes account, click here.


(but Casio? i'll take scientific calculators and digital watches and keyboards ... but cameras? well, sorry am such a pagan)
if you like Marilyn Manson's leftovers (NSFW)

oh God! guess who's back!!!

WoWoWeeeee

guess who's gonna be arrested next? (hint: he's the one among us here playing online games)

bomber moron

if they're pressing charges, they should charge him for being stupid.


unless ... he was a decoy. wait, that's it!!!
ok, am not gonna make any jokes ...

If you still had doubts...

... about whether or not Google is spying on you, then I can't help you.

(Or, to bolster our cuss rating, which is at a wimpy 5.9%, I can't help you, dammit.)