cosmic event

well, he could ... umm, pay them off so his name won't be on the list anymore?

insane weapons of war

... and this one ain't death

well, well, look who's providing a nice example to our countrymen ...

bat me titi?

I knew it!!!

hurray TMZ!

Hollywood pretty boys are wimps.

we're in the wrong profession

Kung Pow, Fat Shit

Happy new year. Try this. It's your Chinese Horoscope online.

Here's what it says about my day today:

Male Earth is your Fame star. This is a period about your fame. Since you tend to expose yourself much more than usual, you will be more judgmental toward people than before. Only good fame will bring you fortune. The events on this day are related to creativity, expression, art, skill, literature, hobbies, talking, food and entertainment. Tiger is your Parent star. This is a period for knowledge. You will spend time with your mentors or elders to learn something from them. Your wealth might decrease because of the expense in the learning cycle. You will care more about your health. The events on this day are related to moving, unstable, lonely, hardworking, religion, creativity, pause, unleash, mystery and strength.

Something related to your reputation might happen during this time. You can express yourself pretty well to the public and gain a good reputation during this cycle. But later, your reputation may suffer do to peoples jealousy. Hopefully, you won’t get sick because of the negative news. Therefore, you need to carefully deal with people not on your side. This will help your money luck for the coming cycle. The sign related to your money is not strong. There is no good short term money investment during this cycle. Generally, the luck on this day to you is fair. The concise prediction for this day is "Fame comes, then goes."

Tiger from this day has a fighting relationship with an animal in birth chart. That means something might bother you a little bit during this during. The aspect is same to the monthly cycle, so find more information is in the monthly cycle.

you say you want an iPhone ...

... right now?

will he sound F.A.T.T. too?

and i say, we don't mind, dear.

could Moses have sounded the same and that's why the pharaoh didn't take him seriously?

yeah, why the hell is he using Dell???

why your baby drowned in his own vomit

addictus facebookus

no different from the people sued

so, Apple/iTunes wants to stab artists in the back eh?

beware of iStockPhoto!

Superhero Physics

banana vote

and in other Super Tuesday news, here's poll worker Sabrina Castanon in Union City, N.J. say hello, Sabrina.


photo appropriated from the Gray Lady.

text for success

next thing you know, you will need to text your stove to cook your food. or your DVR to record American Idol.

Frassum-wassum bureaucrats!

They want to take all the fun out of education.

it's not ice cream

this one's for real.

which would you rather play?

Human Tetris v1.0

Human Tetris v2.0

Captain America disses Abe

try this kung fu!

welcome to America

shotgun baby bang bang

what's next on Time Bandit's wish list to deal with his Korean next-door neighbor terrorist.

the air up there (slightly NSFW)

but i don't wanna work!

work from anywhere with an internet connection

oh, that's how you consider us eh?

why we should keep downloading and not give a single cent to anybody.

Tommy Girl is probably wetting his panties

tell your mother-in-law to knock!

silverman and damon

anybody watched at least the opening scene in Eurotrip (or the battle with the Film Actors Guild in Team America) would get a kick outta this one.

Aircraft ID Chart

Clovelfield

deleting the Y

the rumored premise for Y The Last Man movie. not.

A question for Cloverfield fans

Major spoiler. Drag your mouse over the invisible text below only if youve seen Cloverfield.

What exactly did Cloverfield* do to the guy with the camera? Snort on him? It seemed that the director wanted us to think Clovey bit him, but then he left the camera intact and we see Camera Guy also intact. With Clovey's size, one bite would dispose of both camera and entire upper part of Camera Guy's body. It would have have been a super-accurate bite, what with the relative sizes of both biter and bitee. For a second there, and only because it would obey all laws of common sense, I thought Clovey swallowed Camera Guy, camera and all, and we'll have footage of Clovey's digestive tract, then later, it'd poop out the camera, wherein some survivor picks it up and views the footage the next day and continues to document the carnage. But, alas. Common sense is too much to expect in a movie like this.

========
*The title only makes sense if the name of the monster is Cloverfield. Maybe it had a nametag.

iPorn

What's for dinner?

Y The Last Issue

coming to a close, finally, sadly. rar files soon to follow. the movie too.

F.P.E.

despite owning the DVD, this still made laugh. (don't turn up sound @ work)

NKOTB08

break out your headbands and your cassette tapes - this is the one you've been waiting for!!!

rogue agent

that's it; we're holding a new casting call for the next X-movie.

the (first?) Skylab of the new century

destroy the websites you hate

and turn the sound up while you're at it

guido hunt

jersey boys = douchebags

the guido guide

Spurlock finds Osama. kinda.

WWSuicide

so if it wasn't for his XBox, our fellow blogger Time Bandit would be dead by now?

ah, race ... always trumps common sense

time to clean your screen

weird toys from all over

so being gay is trendy now?

Holy hand grenade of Antioch!

I suppose this thing launches silver bullets.

Oh, for the love of...

For heaven's sake, man. Dont encourage them. These Hollywood types have too much power already. First it was the Abu Sayyaf asking for Robin Padilla, now this.

Filipino fishermen appealed to Hollywood star and UN messenger of peace
George Clooney on Thursday to urge the Philippine government to resume
talks with communist rebels to end a 40-year-old insurgency.

Classy church

Very classy.

sell these capitalists the cable, er ... rope

grumpy old men clinging to outdated beliefs. we hope you die soon. no, asap.

a classy store. very classy.

We are not alone.

Probably the loneliest chick in the solar system. Unless there's more of them somewhere else.

If youll look at the picture, youll notice its similarity to this one. Mystery solved. Sasquatch is a Martian astronaut.

(Of course there's life on Mars, Joe. And its this one.)

good news: Rebecca Romijn will be a widow soon

the link between Emilio Aguinaldo and Mr. Bean!

goth, doggy style

joker's wild

... and dead. did they finish filming?!?!?!?!

good thing one pair of feet wasn't a child's

What th-??

Ive been hearing this for years! Cows cause global warming from the methane they release. Years, I tells ya! Now youre telling us youre only starting to study it? All these years youve been feeding us unverified--pardon the pun--bullshit? No wonder no one believes you.

Mother of pearl, it continues!

The Renaldo Lapuz juggernaut continues unabated. New dance remix versions here.

I have a dream

Zzzzz-z-zzzzz-zzz.

During an appearance at the Convent Avenue Baptist Church in Harlem, the former president was caught nodding off.

Clinton was there during a service to honor Dr. Martin Luther
King Jr., while his wife was nearby at Abyssinian Baptist Church, where
she was endorsed by its minister, Rev. Calvin Butts.

Mabuhay!

We're Brothers Forever
(Music and lyrics by Renaldo Lapuz)

I am your brother
Your best friend forever
Singing the songs
The music that you like
We're brothers til the end of time
Together or not
You’re always in my heart
Your hurting feelings
In you will reign no more

(Repeat until peace reigns in all the land)

Update: A remix version is already out. Now that's fame!


Via: http://www.renaldolapuz.com/

Mecha!!!

Mechwarriors.. old school.

5 hottest G.I. Janes

breaking news: Vader quits Empire

click now

what Cloverfield is

Now open wide... No, I didnt mean your mouth

Well, if Eastern medicine is to be believed, it's all connected. Guy comes in for a bump on the head and ends up with a probe in his ass. Western medicine is catching up to the East, I suppose.

Persaud, 38, was working at a midtown construction site in May 2003 when a plank slammed him in the head, knocking him down.

Medical records state Persaud was "alert and oriented times three" when he was
taken to the hospital's emergency room, where a resident informed him
he needed a rectal examination.

Genosha

Soon the X-Men would have to go in and fight for mutate rights.

Experiments to create Britain’s first embryos that combine human and animal
material will begin within months after a government watchdog gave its
approval yesterday to two research teams to carry out the controversial work.

give your soul to Tommy Girl

bad Jobs

Rodney King, Beijing

walking on Air

looks pretty and all, but it doesn't take long for the critics to come out (and the stock to drop). if i had a spare $2,000, sure, why not ... then again, i don't.

Arent you annoyed when some stranger reads over your shoulder?

Then youll really be pissed about this one.

At issue, [US Director of National Intelligence John] McConnell acknowledges, is that in order to accomplish his plan, the government must have the ability to read all the information crossing the Internet in the United States in order to protect it from abuse.

Yep. That's the plan. Uncle Sam wants to look at that internet porn site youre looking at. And since the Motherland's government does -- Filipino monkey see, Filipino monkey do -- what Uncle Sam does, our own spies would soon be asking for that capability, too.

Der Fuhrer and the Format Wars

Oo, and lata ng Pinoy

Yes, the Filipino can.

Start a war, that is.

A heckling radio ham known as the Filipino Monkey, who has spent years
pestering ships in the Persian Gulf, is being blamed today for sparking
a major diplomatic row after American warships almost attacked Iranian
patrol boats.

The US navy came within seconds of firing at the
Iranian speedboats in the Strait of Hormuz on January 6 after hearing
threats that the boats were attacking and were about to explode.

Update: 'Filipino Monkey' isnt a person. It isnt even a group of persons. The media people got it wrong. It is a phrase, a taunt, that has been in use for over 20 years. MLQ3 has the lowdown on the whole Filipino Monkey phenomenon in the waters of the world. Im looking forward to the response of the the contributors to this blog to the fact that the 'atrocities' might be perpetrated by one of their favorite ethnic groups. Nyahahahaa.. Let the trash talking begin.

Here's something from The Register via the United Filipino Seafarers website.

Anyone who has spent time bridge watchkeeping at sea east of the Suez Canal will be aware of what's known as the "Filipino Monkey" phenomenon. All ships at sea are required to maintain a listening watch on VHF marine channel 16, so as to hear distress messages, collision warnings or other calls. It's the equivalent of the Star Trek "hailing frequencies", as it were. However, you aren't supposed to just blot out channel 16 with chitchat - if you want to hold a conversation or something the correct form is to change channels after establishing comms on 16. In that way, the primary channel stays open for urgent stuff.

In northern waters, this is what happens. Once you get down into points south and east, the knowledge that large numbers of people absolutely have to listen to you - like it or not, as a requirement of maritime law and professional seamanship - seemingly becomes an irresistible temptation for a lot of people in possession of VHF sets.

The most popular phrase used by these people is "Filipino Monkey", said by salty old seafarers to have started out as an insult against Filipinos but now just meaning "I'm bored and want to piss a lot of watchstanders off".

At other times, people will offer karaoke-style musical offerings, brilliant gambits such as "I f*ck your mother/sister/dog", "look out I am going to hit [collide with] you, ha ha" etc. In many ways it's a lot like the internet, but sadly you can't - as a professional seaman - turn it off.

Another major form of airwave pollution on VHF channels is Western - typically US - warships reading out standardised warnings as required by rules of engagement or legal procedure. "Vessel on my port bow this is US/NATO/coalition warship... please keep clear/stop and be boarded in accordance with UN security council resolution blah-blah/be aware I am engaged in flight operations/be warned I will open fire if you do not comply/etc.".

Out in the Gulf and such places this often draws a storm of "Filipino monkey" style comment, very often from vessels nowhere near.

The fact remains that Pinoy seamen, far from being whiny about the whole thing, simply return the compliment, as illustrated by the sailor from Manila quoted by MLQ3 who just smiled it off and recounted how they had a ready comeback for that shit. What Im wary of is the reaction of The Whiny Pinoy community: Boo-hoo! Racial slur! We're oppressed victims! Our sailors arent behaving as victims, so knock it off.

[I have to admit though, that to some Pinoys, unggoy or tsonggo is insulting. I remember Pops Fernandez boo-hooing on TV because his ex Martin Nievera's wife called Pops's kids (with Nievera) monkeys. Probably just a clash of cultures, I thought. 'Monkey' could be a term of endearment, especially when used with your own kids. I used to use it all the time with my kids when they were toddlers, and so did my brother and sister with their kids.]

Hypocrisy, thy color is green

Being from a third world country, I do my best to care for the environment for the sake of posterity. I dont waste electricity, I dont waste water. I dont have a car and dont plan on owning one in the near future unless it's a reasonably-priced, reasonably powered vehicle that runs on cow piss and would last for years. I do my best, really. But then I turn on the news and see this.

A survey of travel habits has revealed that the most environmentally conscious people are also the biggest polluters.

Forget guys like Travolta, or Gore, or Madonna. We know theyre Hollywood and couldnt be trusted to live a low-carbon-footprint lifestyle no matter what they say. We already know theyre hypocrites.

"Green" consumers have some of the biggest carbon footprints because
they are still hooked on flying abroad or driving their cars while
their adherence to the green cause is mostly limited to small gestures.

The Green movement, the global warming crowd, are just saying, "Hey, Third World! Take care of resources and dont waste them. That way there'll be more for us to squander. And those rice fields? It'll be better if you plant them with crops that you could turn into bio-fuels, you know. Dont worry about food. When you have money from the bio-fuels, you can import food from Africa or someplace. Progress, man. Go green!"

crapgadgets 2008

more brainstorming please

maybe even the starving won't eat this?

fictional

the letter that was supposed to be written by the lone Sci-Fi Channel devotee of this blog (no, he didn't, and shame on him)

not your granny's license plates

dial a friend?

separated at birth

video game lookalikes

wanted

if you want to work for this company, you must fancy a fag.

As if the writer's guild werent enough trouble for Jay Leno

The American leader of al-Qaida lashed out at the wife of late-night talk show host Jay Leno in a newly released video-taped message warning fellow Americans of coming "punishment."

Al-Qaida propaganda chief Adam Gadahn, aka. "Azzam the American," singled Mavis Leno out for rebuke for her feminist views and criticism of the misogynistic brutality of the Taliban. He also heaped scorn on first lady Laura Bush, suggesting they are both hypocrites.

Army of one

Viva Las Vegas

CES Booths vs Regulars

IKEA naming system

TSQ360

Bill Gates' retirement

Taser parties? Pfsh!

Taser, schmaser. Tasers won't help you. It's time to pack heat! Pussies.

Jesus 2.0 has arrived!

in Texas too

soon to be another D-list horror movie

reborn as W. Akshat Rohit

such brand loyalty - hats off!

At least they havent lost their sense of humor

Scientists, that is. A scientist has put forth the idea that the universe is a giant virtual reality simulation. I suspect he did it to poke fun on the 'science-fictionization' of science; the idea that a theory is scientific if it's even remotely possible, especially if you can create a mathematical equation for it, real-world empirical evidence optional.

He readily admits that this is a weird idea but points out that it is no more strange than many widely held views in physics such as the many worlds interpretation of quantum mechanics, the big bang and Boltzmann brains.

Exactly, Brian. Ha-ha! Wait til the guys at the water cooler hear about this. You crack me up.

Wait, what? You mean... youre serious?